I pulled out all of the Christmas decorations from the nooks and crannies and corners of my life and let them reside in boxes in my living room and entryway. Last year I gave away boxes of Christmas stuff to charity shops. Moving 3 times in 3 years teaches one to lighten up on stuff. But, I kept plenty. I still have too much Christmas stuff. I unpack and consider which stuff I still need to part with. For now, I set the empty manger scene in front of the fireplace. I set it there to meditate on it, the empty stable.
This year heading up to Christmas is emotionally difficult for me. Two friends passed away on the last day of November. One had cancer and one had ALS. Their deaths are blessed relief from the pain and suffering they were in. But, in their lives, they will be missed. I have another very close friend who is in her last days with ovarian cancer. This leaving thing is a long painful process. I run down to the hospital to visit her as often as I can. It is tough.
The point of this isn't poor me, I have experienced a lot of sadness lately. I am doing enough poor me for all of us. The point is, the empty stable, the nothing, the empty stage, the cold cave, the dark winter night. I need to meditate and pray on the empty stable. It doesn't stay that way. Wait for it, wait for it, the incarnation happens in that stable. God came. The empty stable was the place of great joy.
As a person who has suffered from depression, I need to remember that, things change. Things may seem dark and bleak and sad, but wait for it, life happens and God moves and there is hope again. The stable won't stay empty.
But, for now, watching my friend live her last days, I need to pray about the empty stable, and know that despite the tears and weeping, and sadness that will come when she goes to dance with Jesus, my life goes on, It seems and there will be joy and sadness and life again. Life. And it is enough, it is everything. It is the gift.
This year heading up to Christmas is emotionally difficult for me. Two friends passed away on the last day of November. One had cancer and one had ALS. Their deaths are blessed relief from the pain and suffering they were in. But, in their lives, they will be missed. I have another very close friend who is in her last days with ovarian cancer. This leaving thing is a long painful process. I run down to the hospital to visit her as often as I can. It is tough.
The point of this isn't poor me, I have experienced a lot of sadness lately. I am doing enough poor me for all of us. The point is, the empty stable, the nothing, the empty stage, the cold cave, the dark winter night. I need to meditate and pray on the empty stable. It doesn't stay that way. Wait for it, wait for it, the incarnation happens in that stable. God came. The empty stable was the place of great joy.
As a person who has suffered from depression, I need to remember that, things change. Things may seem dark and bleak and sad, but wait for it, life happens and God moves and there is hope again. The stable won't stay empty.
But, for now, watching my friend live her last days, I need to pray about the empty stable, and know that despite the tears and weeping, and sadness that will come when she goes to dance with Jesus, my life goes on, It seems and there will be joy and sadness and life again. Life. And it is enough, it is everything. It is the gift.