I don't really like to swim in the ocean. I have had a life long fear of sharks. I used to think they were in the garden pond (bathtub sized) in our garden (in Illinois) when I was 3. I never even saw the ocean in real life until I was about 13. So, I am not sure where that fear came from. Cartoons, I guess. Since those childhood days I have learned to swim in oceans. I lived in Okinawa (small sub tropical isle in the East China Sea), Florida, and Hawaii. I swam in some oceans. The point is, I would rather avoid for the most part swimming in oceans. I am always mindful of the sharks and riptides and dangers of oceans. I dip my toes in, walk out a ways in the water, but swim reluctantly.
I am like that about painful experiences that become painful memories. I think on them briefly and try to move my mind on. I try to put them out of my mind, to avoid those memories of pain. That strategy enables me to go on and live my life. It isn't a good thing to dwell in the pain. That creates bitterness and resentment which is harder to shove down and ignore. I think about the painful memories like swimming in the ocean.
Sometimes I can't avoid the ocean of pain. It is present for me as the ocean was when I lived on those islands. I have recently experienced some healing of memories. For them to me healed, I had to swim with them for a while. Once I needed rescuing because I was drowning in the pain. I have been thinking about and praying with the painful memories and thoughts. I am trying to recognize, like the weak swimmer I am, that I can't spend too long in the ocean of pain. I can sit with it for a while and relive the experience. But, then I need to give it to Jesus. I need to get out of the water, dry off and live my life.
By swimming in, rather than avoiding the oceans of pain, I have come to find grace and mercy even in the painful episodes and sad events of my life. I have come to trust that God was and is always there with me. Especially when I am swimming in the ocean.
I am like that about painful experiences that become painful memories. I think on them briefly and try to move my mind on. I try to put them out of my mind, to avoid those memories of pain. That strategy enables me to go on and live my life. It isn't a good thing to dwell in the pain. That creates bitterness and resentment which is harder to shove down and ignore. I think about the painful memories like swimming in the ocean.
Sometimes I can't avoid the ocean of pain. It is present for me as the ocean was when I lived on those islands. I have recently experienced some healing of memories. For them to me healed, I had to swim with them for a while. Once I needed rescuing because I was drowning in the pain. I have been thinking about and praying with the painful memories and thoughts. I am trying to recognize, like the weak swimmer I am, that I can't spend too long in the ocean of pain. I can sit with it for a while and relive the experience. But, then I need to give it to Jesus. I need to get out of the water, dry off and live my life.
By swimming in, rather than avoiding the oceans of pain, I have come to find grace and mercy even in the painful episodes and sad events of my life. I have come to trust that God was and is always there with me. Especially when I am swimming in the ocean.