The Place God Wants Me to Be

I have had  a hard time throughout my life accepting that I am where God wants me to be.  I was raised to be responsible and to work hard and put in effort for things I wanted.  I was not raised to sit by and let things happen, I was raised to make things happen.  The problem with that as I see it right now, is that I blame myself if I am not putting in the effort or my efforts don't change my circumstances.

I have been talking with God about this a lot lately.  Acceptance.  Even for the bad stuff, the stuff that hurts, the stuff that seems like a big old mess.  I am exactly where God wants me to be.  I have potential and worth and goodness, even in the bleak times and the sad times and the imperfect human condition times.  I just need to open my eyes and find the joy and the happiness and the goodness that is there.

I need to tune out the voices that tell me I am not good enough, that I need to try harder, that my problems are all my fault.  I need to hear the inner voice that tells me I am beloved of God. I am worthy because Christ died for my salvation and the rest is gravy.

Today, this day, right now, I am in the place where God wants me to be.  He will never forsake me.  He will never let me go.  I am His.  I am right there in His arms like the lost sheep.  I am loved.