Bent Needle

My favorite needle to quilt with is a very slim needle that has bent over the years from the pressure.  While I think it might be easier to use if it were straight and I have tried many other needles, this one that is bent is my favorite.  It goes through the cloth so well.  It doesn't get stuck like the thicker needles do.  And now I have used it for so long that it has memories attached to it, although it is just a needle.

Now as I approach 60, I feel a little like the bent needle.  My feet and ankles will never be the same.  They hurt sometimes.  Sometimes they hurt a lot.  I need to lose some weight, a lot of weight.  I am having trouble with that.  I will never be that neat housekeeper I thought I might become.  I doubt if I will ever have that dog I used to dream of.  The list of ways I am sad and disappointed in who I am and what my life has offered could be endless.

But, in Christ who strengthens me, I can find other  meanings.  I could be the bent needle that Jesus is making my quilt with.  My health issues have slowed me down and brought me to prayer more times than I can count.  I have sought out healing because I am not perfect, will never be perfect.  I am not a housekeeper, but there are worse.  I am creative, making quilts and planning books with my sister and trips to take for my 60th birthday.  And a dog would just be a mess to clean up after and I don't love cleaning and with my foot problems, taking it for a walk isn't even in the picture sometimes.

I am like my bent needle.  Christ loves me with my imperfections.  I am useful and loved.  And who is to say that the needle can't straighten out a bit.  I might still have ways to make those improvements and achieve those dreams and more.  Perhaps there are even better dreams for this old bent needle, yet to come.